To do list

Essay
Math
Look at the path before you forget how to take a step
Freshen breath
Learn how to fly
Don't try to act too sly
Remember that you could die
There is no reason to deny
It would be as easy as a sigh
So today I will try to be alive
Cuz tomorrow will never be ripe
And yesterday keeps falling behind
Now in the AM it's already 2:59
And I still can't feel the time
Hopefully by seven I'll be able to rise
Losing sleep just to make something rhyme
I think this is where I have lost my mind
That may have been a predictable line
So I think this is where an ending I will find
Though I still find the need to write

A new minute and I decided to change this up
That flow had lost its spunk
I will attempt to make this one erupt
So some slack for me could you please cut
Cuz I will never be good enough
To write something that's not ridiculous
A line may sound good if I come across some luck
But its all crazy psycho babble until it earns me a buck
Or two for that matter, this world really does suck
It seems only money can put you above
But what we all need is some peace and some love
Not shiny new stuff
I promise it's not too tough
All you got to do is put down that mask that looks so rough
And let your self shine through all that is corrupt

who is

missing who is
lifting who is
giving who is
knowing who is
owing who is
sifting through the
drifted
who is molding
who is holding
who is rowing
this boat that's
been roaming smooth coastal oceans
who is changing
who is saving
you from your dwindling faith
who is betraying
who is enslaved to
the easy way, the natural course of least resistance
 to live as what you bid for, casting lots to make it big once,
to ease this existence, and making sure to ignore
any possible assistance, from He who seems forgotten
made virtual by speaking of Him as some far off constellation
that is a meager projection of His true love and protection
for the whole of his creation
now you can sit here and try to play dumb
but I know that you picked up my diction
so you can put it down or smooth yourself out with this friction
either way I hope you enjoyed this twisted script of my affliction

This is to you

to you, the girl that laughs at my jokes when I'm sleeping
the girl I can approach when I'm dreaming
the girl I talk to without ever speaking
tiny little conversations when our eyes meet
and the moment they lock in I am peaking
on this high that your silent stare increases
so I look away before I start seeking
hope that your gaze will be mine for the keeping
I would walk up but my confidence is leaking
as if my pants I were peeing
I just want to know what you're thinking
but, I know that is not something I will recieve
so I live with this doubt, walking with it in my shoes
cuz I feel pretty sure that I'm just another pair of eyes from across the room
bleeding out these pleading messages that maybe today will contain the moment
that brings us together. Though I have this inkling that is silently saying maybe this fixation could become mutual, if I wasn't so obsessed with getting your affection, spending every chance setting my attention on your direction
Then I realize, I'm still writing about her, I just give her a new name and face to trick myself into thinking I'm over her, but I am most definitely still under her spell that's so lovely and smells of pungent flowers tired of the ground, slowly reaching around to find up and the sky within, which is no more than an idea, for what is up to me could be down to thee and the white I see could be anything to ye, such infinite possibilities to how we perceive this world we make real within our imagination
please come watch with me as the sun setting behind these mountains ranges makes the sky look like ripped pages out of the story I've been painting on the horizon

again and again

You are staring into my present and your past, as I am writing this I am sending out these written shadows to one day get absorbed by the worm holes through your eyes to your universe. While for you it is today, I'm back here sending these words out in groups for your mind to unpack, just as the stars in the sky are sending a light from the past casting shadows in this future: when you are staring at the night sky your mind is stuck in the past but when you stare into this, the past is stuck in your mind.

Ask me now and later I still won’t have an answer because I am forever cursed to walk the path of a fool this folly at my shoulder keeps me company and my fear of my Lord keeps me on my knees I hope that one day I may find Him as he has found me, soon you will all see that these days are only started so that they may end, just as a meal is only created to be devoured by the ravenous crows that wait on the power lines for your heart to slip so they may pounce and keep you from the life everyone is seeking whether they realize it or not we are all just searching for the same love, but we won’t ever see that love is searching for us, we just need to stop hiding from ourselves.

Fix me, please just find a way to fix me, for I was never put together, I showed up in this world disassembled and I've been laying it all out for you to see, so please put me together in the moon's shine and watch me light up with the sun's rise

Ode to the snooze button

Oh what a wonderful button that I keep pluckin cuz I'm stuck in this dungeon of comfort
I know I'll be late, but that's my fate, this sleep is too great and I only have myself to blame for staying awake long into the A.M. so now I keep hatin on that screech that shakes me from my dreams and I irately strain as much weight as I can attain to sink that button down into silence, finally that wretched noise has been detained.
Today is losin' cuz I keep choosin to abuse that splendid snooze, I wish time would slow to an ooze but it's runnin faster than an Olympian that was juiced, time is gettin killed, hanging from a noose, waking up this early was all a ruse, last night I drank too much and had confidence that I wouldn't let the snooze accrue all these sloppy clicks, but this game was fixed I had no chance and now my BiC has no more ink to stitch more diction into this picture of words, so I'm gonna ditch this bitch but before I go I must say thank you snooze button, for existing

letter's formed into words

Sometimes, I like to imagine that you think about what you are about to say to me as much as I think about what I am going to say to you and sometimes, I like to imagine how it would feel to see the sunrise trickle down your body after it raced here just to be with you, other times I like to imagine a world in which I stop daydreaming and start living this out in your arms, then I remember the way my speech buckles when I put too much stress on it and I go back to my daydreams because these night times are getting harder to put to rest with you keeping my mind so preoccupied. Though most of the time I'm just lookin into this trying to add another line or two, silently soaring through these letters and all the weight they leave behind, quietly displacing this white with this absence of light to fill up your sight and make your thoughts spell this out, word by word I am sneaking into your eyes fighting for the focus of your fragile attention.
Are you there? Sometimes I wonder this, and then I tell myself "Stop staring at that lady's feet" and sort of shake my head and blink to make it seem like I was just in deep thought and not creepin on someone that I will not make eye contact with ever again. Wherever I was going with that, here I am and I am still just busy behind these paragraphs, that began with no purpose, not even to present these pointless phrases: it will never be possible for me to ever bind to any plan for today is not about to go your way and your maps are already eroding into obsolete, the river doesn't know what direction it will be flowin, it just goes with where it's goin, and it still always manages to get to where it's most at home.