forte

there once was a girl I never met

a shoe string warrior on her last thread

never looking for an instead

always ends up entrenched

her battles 

were never hers

fighting to fight

like victory could ever satisfy

like defeat would truly satisfy

she once kept a secret from me
didn't want me to feel the weight
only told me what I needed
"it was heavy enough" she secretly repeated

told me to keep writing to lighten up my mind

before the voices cause my demise
crush them into this inky silence

I don't remember what she called me
I don't think she'll ever call me again
I don't remember what I said
if I even said a thing

The open silence kept my mouth shut
eyes locked in limbo, looking for anything that's not ourselves
a nod knotted my tongue as we parted to talk our separate walks

I don't think we would recognize each other
if our walks talked a second time
so
I'll just keep dropping all of my problems off at this pool
contained within the lines that your eyes swim along
looking for anything that isn't another question
sorry
answers are not my blanket fort