what?

As of right now I want to write now
defeat and drag my mind down the page
doin my best to leave no trail
but I'm lost in the middle of an
end
that might bow to a beginning when the lights shout
to make it feel the night getting shined out
sneaking around the sphere like how
I'm pouncing on the empty white
writing just to find ground
somewhere beneath the sky's clouds

until then I'll just bite down
on the moment
try to keep it tightly wound
right around the time I found
inside the sound of my memory
I'll cherish it all
even if no love decides to compound
I'll keep putting a pip in my step
I'll keep shoving a smile into my mouth
I'll keep taping my heart up on my shoulder
it's always trying to escape when I confine it to its house inside my chest
like somehow this time it won't fall by itself
I keep it on a leash at my side
so that when you meet it you will see it
beating like raindrops in a hurricane
while I'm standing in your eye unaware of the storm you brought
surrounding my every thought
drowning my words with your windy stare