dusk is dawn

The morning air so sweet
from night to day we swing
higher and higher we reach
as we kick our feet
screaming
for another push in the right direction
as if He hasn't been clear enough
this whole game you've been playing
with all this heartbreak you've been saving
piling up your problems in the shade
there isn't anyone to blame
just love yourself and forget to hate

time is an illusion

It is 4:40 in the morning
I should be snoring
rather I am exploring this new world
I created with a flick of my wrist
just a little bit of diction and the page is imprisoned
to by my prism
splitting up the facets of ink
I practice every week
every night I never sleep
I just blink and I blink
til the brink of this bleached tree is reached

I just think and I think
til I know that I'm sinking
in this ocean of emotions
I never learned to control
I watch as I burn all my bridges
no stitches just division

maybe one day we will all sing again

all is He

So fast
so slow
that past
it grows
every moment

peeling this present
one partially digested second at a time

under this Sun
there is nothing new
only people to prove to
that this present isn't useless
we can choose to produce this
before we lose our youth

rather than just lose it
forgetting why we knew shit
forgetting how we used to
cruise to the music
forgetting what my muse is
too filled up with amusements
void of any truth

But lately I've been

laughing at the rest of em
not worried about impressing them
just searching for a better friend
someone I can adventure with
search for a fresher breath
find all of my stenciled deaths
lined out for me to wrestle with
people always pressurin'
reminding me I'm lesser than
all of these lessons
that are like
deserts full of treasure chests

I'm barely scratching at this surface
making myself a festered mess
sniffing at the pleasantness
ignoring my own bloody steps
remembering I am so blessed
God is so magnificent
a supernova raindrop
a sunrise at midnight
a smile on a rooftop
lighting up the brightness
He is all

one day I'll understand

I don't see a future
I see a roof

I am the new kid
and you are the proof
that I don't need approval
I only need your abuse
I eat it
I consume
all your hatred
all your fumes
I eat them up
I follow through

I swallow and chew
all your words and your views
til I spit up my heart
all my thoughts and my spark

my argument

let me start


I usually look both ways before I cross the street
rarely do I like what I find on the other side

I don't know how to walk into a room as myself
mostly because I've never known who that is

I always start my sentences with a word
and it's usually an expletive

my mouth is as dirty as my mind
and my mind got kicked out of the gutter

I never know where the line is
I am blind, I can't find it
I am fine though, as long as I'm quiet
but I can not deny that
my mouth is quite violent

I like it
and I don't
so you can fight it
but I won't
I just ignite it
and watch
as my fuse gets loose and runs into your noose
you keep tying around my screws
that nothing could tighten
been loose for as long as I can forget

nothing is
everything was
the present is all that remains
everything changes
but nothing does

the future has no door handle
just a hole letting only so much light in
pushing and pulling
waves balancing on the tip of my tongue
 finding the farewells in my salutations

under where?

I feel like a pair of pants
I think like a pair of rants
battling one another no fair
no chance for my chair, I stand
in my corner, its all I have
beside my name, which I'm pretty sure is Sam

I'm not really one to plan
though I do enjoy myself a nap
maybe a couple grams
over the weekend finding Saturn
leaving Mars to pace its patterns
making matters matter without gravity
Its all actually
floating falling fracturing
I'm just here passing
don't fail well
though I practice
failing often
rarely softly

my face
has seen some disgrace
in the stars and in the taste
of dirt and shame
the thirst is pain
the worst is gain
my first fake name was Quenton
my second was wasted
on the third

I've never tasted dessert
the moon is always turning
I burden my brain with battles
burning the dust in the attic
searching for love in the static

I'm always certain that
these are lonely words
trying to picture
a fiction in which I'm listening
to any of this

wait what?

I've been drinking all this liquor
only getting sicker
never taking time
just sipping quicker
always giving lines
so fucking simple

I lost the cap
so my hat's off to my liver
for living
through this fifth

I am little
slowly slipping
my mind dripping
off this page
on the reg
I am late
always taking
a moment to wait
and smell the way
your eyes look in shame
as my mouth derails
spitting snails
slimy nails
building my treehouse
up in my cloud
rain loading down
filling sound with
ponds of waves
and
waves of longing
as if this motion might end the groaning
no more quoting just say what you know

I'm tired
and I've seen this episode before

lost and bound

Any time I see the night I lose my mind
I find my light inside the lines that I can't write
inside the crime of my first fight
where riddles go to die
and limericks come alive

I know my time is finite
but
I think my space is sliding
through the limited tries
I got one chance to do this right
but I've never been able to define
right from wrong
you from me
this from that
the only difference between
words and hurricanes
is I never expected my lips to devastate
I was just trying to spit a rhyme
to light the spark hiding in your eyes
to fill the breath you left behind
I caught up but I'll always let you down
a waterfall puking out spectrums of why not me
eating the answers I scraped from the bottom of all my bottles
use them to see spectrums of my complete mess

standing on the horizon is as easy as it seems
we just feel the need to make gales out of breezes
so I've always got my kite and string
in case you blow my way and bring
a gust of everything that we were singing
back when we were singing